Skip to main content

Break-ups




Ever wondered why the longest relationships cause so many ripples if and when it's about to end? The beautiful Jordin had her share three(3) years after being in a seemingly loving relationship with Jason, the phone break-up, car return and rumours of Jason feeling compelled to get married. Both parties can get on the defensive and lash out at each other, get dis-stabilized for a while, fall ill, get bitter etc...basically though this is simply what happens: they have been together for so long and they have forgotten how to be alone.
 Being in love can be quite fun most of the time our brain stops taking decisions for us and our heart takes over. Moving in together, having sex on an everyday basis, combining finances are some of the incorrect decisions our hearts are bound to make. This usually turns out disastrous when the end hits. There are ways to keep tabs on our emotions to prevent our hearts from being completely shattered if you (or the other partner) wants out:
  • Don't take rash decisions: yes your mind tells you to go with the flow...let love rule blah blah blah, I am not saying you should get extremely cautious and suspicious(like me) but take a chill pill. Don't introduce him/her to friends or family who might begin to pressure you when the relationship is off.  Keep it light for a while.
  • Don't assume: somewhere in my previous articles I have said this and I am repeating it...don't ever assume." He's my fiance", "we are getting married when things get better" all these sort of assumptions seem to rule relationships today. However, when those expectations ain't forthcoming this leads to extreme hurt and disappointment. I believe in asking questions, defining what you are into. You could be in a relationship with someone for five(5) years without him/her having plans of marrying you.
  • Be vigilant and smart: any change in style or sudden character change in your partner shouldn't be over looked. Ask questions, don't think he/she might be cheating-know if they are. This is so everything doesn't go KABOOM!!! in your face all at one, afterall there's no smoke without fire.
  • Don't build your life around one person: what I mean is don't make someone the center of your universe, "you can hardly breathe if he isn't there", "you expect to be her everything". The truth is you are one individual and being in love doesn't magically double you. Live your life with your friends and family just like before, don't shut everyone out just because you are in love. Experience shows it hurts even more if you are just trying to re-connect with people you shut out after a relationship ends.
  • Lastly I ask you not to expect too much. Be simple minded in your expectations.
I hope this article was a bit interesting please get back to me on facebook www.facebook.com/yenique9ja, have a great week ahead.



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

HEY!!! QUEENS

Personally I'm enjoying this "empowered and liberated"/"I'm more than my body" power tussle women are engaging in. I mean in one breathe we mention how we're empowered, liberated, not bound by traditional norms and cultures so we're free to flaunt our bodies, keyword "our" specifically to remind the men not to advise us on modesty. Then as soon as men start to objectify women and talk about how the ass looks perfect to be tapped, we jump on the train of " I am more than a body". Sis for the life of me I don't get us. What are we on about? First of all if you're a model, Onlyfans star, porn actress (and other similar careers), body activist, artiste, actress I totally understand why your full breast/ass is outside. The others though, WHAT IN THE BEJESUS HELL IS THAT? Queens forget the whole liberation talk let's face it, we have the stage. We can be out here talking about fighting domestic violence among...
6 comments
Read more

SELF(The Journey to being truly Altruistic).

  So   one night  last week while trying desperately to keep myself awake, I had a pep talk with myself   (more like a TED talk,  because  I was there acting like  there was a  live audience  in front of me  and being so Zen).   Well i n my usual Pep/TED talk fashion I was mouthing the words ever so peacefully, a skill I wish I have mastered in life , you see  I fancy a Zen outlook, an understanding personality and a calm voice but like most things I fancy  these are all still a work in progress, but you can say I am working .  In like manner my talk focused on something I am  also  working to be,  put  quite simply “A genuinely Altruistic Person”.    Altruistic (simply meaning unselfish ) ,  I am trying my best in all ways to be as unselfish as possible. So a part from trying to stay awake this started from hearing/seeing the phrase “focus on your own happiness” a lot more in the pa...
7 comments
Read more

Darling, it's our Anniversary!

Hey, my love, it is our 20th anniversary and I cannot wait to share this momentous journey of ours with the world. I was barely 10 when I met you, I remember my cousin Seun taking me to meet you at the café, cybercafé, yea that was a thing back then. You were memorable, sweet, interesting, and ever so smart. Darling internet terror of some, lover of mine, I loved you then and I love you now. Let me begin by sharing with these kind readers beautiful memories we share. I once made a friend via yahoo! Messenger (yea that one) so many years ago, I cannot recall when exactly but he is the only “Tunde” with a good heart. We had good times, we were friends as far as friendship goes but he had the “sickle cell” disease and last I heard of him he was on dialysis, you see every time I log on to any chatroom on your space darling I keep praying he would pop up again and I can get to tell him even if I got only one chance “ I love you Tunde and you ar...
5 comments
Read more