How much is your wife?

For centuries now the payment of dowry or bride price has been a marriage function of many cultures worldwide.  The word “dowry” means the wealth transferred from the bride’s family to the groom or his family at marriage, it is not always money it can be furniture or clothes. Bride price is an amount of money, property or any other form of wealth presented to the bride’s family on occasion of her wedding. This article deals with the bride price concept in Nigerian cultures and how a standard bride price is determined.

                Sometimes in the year 2014 an application that calculates bride price became popular albeit for a short while because Nigerians frowned on the qualities the app developer thought determined bride price though he said it was just for fun. The calculator had questions like “are you light-skinned?”, “level of education” etc, some people believed those were extreme but do these actually determine how much a family would ask for? Attending various Yoruba weddings (ofcourse they do not ask for much in actual bride price money) I hear the MC usually a woman ask the groom to pay for “iyawo ile”(i.e. aunties and in-laws) who took care of the bride while young, then air ticket for the letter reader or even pay so they can be allowed to stand after prostrating. These little things are bride price in my concept and if you are getting married to the “MVP” of one yoruba family be ready to do a bit more “dash dash”, not forgetting the box of new clothes, food items, and remember they would ask you to pay for the party.

                The ibo’s are more direct they come straight out and ask for a large sum for the bride price and other sometimes outrageous little gifts, wrappers, wine etc. In all Nigerian traditions however the attributes of the bride boosts or decreases the family’s demands. In recent times finding a Virgin bride has become somewhat difficult thereby making this something a groom should cherish (i.e. pay for) if offered. Then her “Adaness”, is she the first daughter or even an only child?, well be ready to pay more. Also if she is a child who is much loved and catered to by the family you would have to get approval (i.e. pay) from all guardians aunties, grandma etc. her educational background might boost while something like a previous marriage or children might reduce the expectations and demand.

                Some cultures price their bride by weight like the Mongolians, in Nigeria we usually overlook physical attributes. Right or wrong the payment of bride price is a beautiful part of our culture and adds more colour to our traditional weddings. Moreover, I think the bride loves the attention and smile she is putting on her parent’s face.

Let me know your views and you can get back to me on facebook www.facebook.com/yenique9ja.

Have a lovely week ahead.