Yay! So it’s a new year and as typical Nigerians
our sentiment levels have skyrocketed. Suddenly everyone’s optimistic for the
New year and we all seem to have goals only 2020 can inspire us to work on.
First, I hate sentiments and I hate fake mirth…so this period is not exciting
for me based on secular reasoning. I am genuinely grateful that I am alive this
morning to type, to feel, to want, to have a clear head(a great blessing in my
case) but I have no sentimental desires for the New Year, mainly due to the fact
that years prior I have acted as the typical Nigerian and set resolutions,
desires, plans, weight loss goals, to-do lists and what not and at each I have
failed. Woefully. So I decided that it takes more than a date change to inspire
a sister.
I am a very practical soul and I only believe
things proven by science or experience (my experience). So I am going to be
sharing some tips on how to better ourselves this year based on my findings
from a self-survey in 2019.
First in everything you do be
KIND. As in say hi to strangers you pass by on the street, gift a beggar that
loose change, buy something for your colleagues, be extra courteous, bite your
tongue when you are about to make that salty comment about someone, compliment
someone’s looks…just be nice. It’s not just good for the receiver, it helps you
feel good about yourself and sets the mood for a good time.- Be INTENTIONAL, you prayed 31st
night for a holiday trip abroad and you are still going to spend all your
salary leaving nothing behind, be there ooo. You are just “jonzing’, I get
miracles happen but people let’s be intentional, so we do not get disappointed
when those dreams aren’t actualized. Save up for your dream trip, prepare for
that exam you’re about to write, learn something new about your dream job, send
out those CVs, put in effort. Also, do not wait for any date to be intentional
about anything, start now. The internet is your friend use it to your
advantage, there are online piggybanks, travel planning agencies, online exam
tutorials, Nairaland(yea I said it, it’s a learning hub and info center). Plus
even if you do not succeed you have succor in the fact that you tried.
- Be SELFISH about your space.
Toxic people, leeches, the “constantly-brooding-sad-complaining” prototypes
please let them all out. Stay away from anyone and situation that affects how
you see yourself or your sanity. It’s not even something you can compromise on.
I hardly block people, but I had to block some of my friends last year. I just
knew it had to be done and I have slept more soundly since I did. I mean it was
difficult to intentionally cut people off, but it had to be done. Every
encounter with these folks left me doubting my existence and though toxic
people always claim not to “know what they are doing wrong” even at that it’s
not your place to teach them, let them be. Be very selfish with yourself.
- Put positive and legit PRESSURE on
yourself…I get this phrase often “don’t put pressure on yourself” but my people
if you don’t pressure yourself the world will, who better to put the heat on
you than yourself. Set your eyes on a goal and go for it with everything you’ve
got, pressure and all. When I first got a job, I was overwhelmed, traffic, work
stress etc. I totally stopped blogging, writing or doing any of the things I
had passion for, my excuse? “I can’t come and go and kill myself”. In truth
though my body has the capacity to work 10 hours and still spare an hour to
read, write or do any other thing other than sleep. 2019 was the year of
pushing myself to limits my mind had created and it was super fun, plus I
didn’t die of exhaustion. So I guess my point is push yourself, don’t assume
you can’t until you try. Your body and mind would amaze you, they are willing
to work put them to the test.
- “To thine own self be TRUE”.
Don’t try to change your “good’ core values for anyone. It doesn’t last and
only affects you in the wrong way. As for me, I am a “weird nerd” and I am
owning that sh#t, I don’t care about heels and flashy looks, I would rather sit
in and read than party, so to my friends, I am declining those invites this
year and don’t worry I am prettier without makeup.
- Lastly BELIEVE in something, someone, a deity,
a totem, GOD. Just have something to hold on to in times of despair. Preferably
someone/thing you have proved to exist or work based on your own conviction.
There are times that reading, talking, therapy won’t work and you just have to
hold on to your belief system with all your strength to pull through
situations. Personally, I am a Christian and I run to God for comfort when down
and I can tell you boldly that I feel ease after. Every man needs to believe in
something.
These are my tips for an amazing, goal reaching
year and I wish us all success...XOXOXX
PS: there’s a tip I am leaving out
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