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Slowing down

Our hearts do not have a remote control so sometimes we find ourselves falling in love seemingly "uncontrollably ".Love at first sight or Love at first uhmm according to Wale's lyrics in Lotus flower, this feeling can be quite spontaneous and we find ourselves acting completely off track and when asked we blame it on love.
  Not to burst your bubbles though but not all such feelings are actually love most are just "lust in disguise ".Some culminate in long lasting relationships but some go awry and turn into an over rushed thing that would eventually die out. After studying such situations closely I noticed there's actually a trend and I decided to put out a list of my top five (5) signs that shows you are in a "rush rush" relationship and give tips on how to slow it down so you can get the best out.
   #You paint your new partner perfect : "he's the cutest guy ever", "oh she's more caring than all my ex'es put together " and so on.You tend to see only what you want, you act completely oblivious even to obvious defects. This however is one disastrous act because by the time reality sets in you immediately fall out of love. Always meet people with this at the back of your mind *no one is perfect, if he/she seems perfect keep scratching till you see some dirt.*

   #The person constantly fills your thoughts : even experts say it's ok to think of someone you really like but then again constantly daydreaming and thinking of a particular person is simply obsessive and spells doom so it's a better option to clear your mind of obsessive thoughts, occupy your mind with other things and hopefully your judgement won't be clouded.

#Your happiness actually depends on how much the person likes you: Generally speaking ladies  get to do this more but I know a few guys who do too.Their happiness depends on how their partner treats them,if he/she appreciates their look only then would they believe they look good. It's a bad sign and usually the people who do this have low self esteem and they depend on other people to teach them how to love themselves. In such cases learn to know your "selling point " and appreciate it . Don't wait for someone else.

  #Usually when that person pops up in your head you think of sex: somehow you link that person to sex .You imagine how it would be and there's this urge to satisfy your sexual fantasies of this person. Love as it is comprises of a lot of things and the true feeling of it isn't so sexually consuming.

   #You immediately edit your life and fix him/her in the picture : it's totally cool to include your partner in your life but not within a few weeks,and you should wait to see the willingness of the other party to do the same. Don't change routine /friends  etc just to give room for a new flame.

When you find yourself jumping the gun with a new love just take a chill pill and you will be sure to get the best out of it that way. It's yenique,have a pleasant week ahead.Please comment or get back to me on Facebook.

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